Ode to an Old Friend

I actually wrote this post two years ago today, on April 9, 2016. I did not publish it until today. My friend who is the subject of the post died weeks after it was written. His name was Hans-Joachim Schreiber. He was a brilliant, good and decent man, and a true friend in every respect.

Growing older can bring perspective, wisdom, and sometimes joy. But it can also bring sadness. Last week, I learned that a dear old friend from Germany has untreatable cancer. He cannot see visitors. There is nothing to be done except to send thoughts and prayers.

It came suddenly. I spoke to him only four or five weeks ago. He had a bad cold, but felt he was getting better, and was planning a trip. I had called more recently to try to arrange a lunch or dinner on an upcoming trip across the pond, and learned the bad news.

It has not yet sunken in for me. He is a true friend. Someone you can always count on. Incredibly intelligent. A true genius, actually. He speaks German as a native language, and is fully fluent in French and English. He actually knows Latin. He knows more about more things, and at a detailed level, than anyone I have known. Always looking to learn new things. He has an amazing sense of humor and remembers every joke he ever heard. We did not get to see each other often, but I always looked forward to seeing him. We talked about life, family, cars, aircraft, inventions, and, yes, legal issues. It was always a good time. I honestly cannot remember ever having a disagreement with him, although there are subjects on which we agreed to disagree. He always seemed like the older brother I never had.

In trying to process this, I have thought about what he would probably say. I imagine it would go something like this: "It's very sad, but there is really nothing to be done. Try to be kind to my wife and family. Remember the good times and me with a smile. Try not to be sad, because it will not accomplish anything. I've had a truly good and interesting life, a wonderful family, and many friends. I would have liked a few more years, but I really can't complain."

A few more thoughts. The Romans said "carpe diem," or seize the day. Psalm 118:24 tells us: "This is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it." He is not a religious man, but I think he would agree with the sentiment. We need to try to live and enjoy every day and every interaction with family and friends. You never know if it will happen again.

Here's to you, old friend. You will be greatly and profoundly missed and always remembered. I will try to do that with a smile and not a tear.